A moment and it’s gone. Our memories consist of swathes of time – when we lived in that house, did such and such a job, were in a certain relationship... But actually, do such blobs of time really exist? Are our lives divided into bite sized logical chunks or actually, do they merely comprise thousands of unrelated moments all shimmering in space?
Looking backwards, we organise our memories into events, holidays, happenings. Looking forwards, we organise our imaginings into ‘what might happen’ often based on our fears, and put energy into imagining how we would react if the feared thing did happen, and how we would then feel... argh! A lot of energy goes into that, and meanwhile, we are at the beach, sipping a cocktail, maybe not tasting it, and not noticing the beautiful sunset!
I recently stayed at Tecekula, and went fishing early one morning with a local fisherman. With a beaming smile, he took me to his distant water platform and we whizzed in circles, line extended, coolie hat over my eyes, laughing at nothing and everything. Suddenly we caught a fish, and he let me pull it in. Grabbing it in his rough square hands his face opened in utter joy, just a like a child, and he laughed gleefully. I was amazed! He looked like he was catching his first ever fish! I thought it so wonderful that he could feel such joy from something so simple and for him, so everyday. I felt a great sense of envy and admiration for his life.
How can we be more present? How can we ‘be here now?’ There is only NOW. The past is done, the future ain’t come yet. It is always so, yet how we forget...
Why do we absent ourselves from the present, anyway? I suppose mostly, because we are uncomfortable with our feelings. Rather than just allowing our feelings to be as they are, embracing them, we tend to reject, numb, switch off, substance abuse, alcohol, TV distract and any other form of removing ourselves from what is happening right now. Hey – feelings are scary! What to do? Well, the only thing to do with feelings is to... feel them. Acknowledge them, embrace them. Accept them for what they are. Don’t judge them (like, beat yourself up for having the feeling). Allow it to be. Embrace it. Then notice and feel what feeling is under the feeling. Just keep going. It is so liberating and you will discover that any feeling will dissipate like magic if you just allow and embrace it. It’s only when feelings are repressed that they grow and become a problem.
A hint: you don’t have to act upon your feelings necessarily. (This can make feeling them less scary!) You can choose to just notice them, and embrace them. You don’t have to necessarily go hit someone just because you feel angry. You can just notice you are angry, embrace that, and be with it.
Making judgements is the way to create hell for ourselves. This is where we take something that has happened and judge it, make it bad, rather than just noticing how it is and allowing it to be. For example, someone trips you up in the street and you imagine that they have some grudge against you, or that ‘the universe has it in for you’ or some such. All that has actually happened is someone’s foot stretched out in front of yours and you fell over it. Judgement is the ‘so-and so shouldn’t do this, shouldn’t do that’ kind of mentality. Then we beat ourselves up, put energy into thinking how we want things different from how they actually are. This is suffering, and self-created. Heaven is, you’re in the street, you fall over, you get up, and there’s an end to it.
Exercise in being present: Get conscious of what you are doing right now. Notice your breathing. Notice your thoughts. Notice what your hands are feeling, your body. Listen to the sounds around you. What can you smell, taste? Come back to the moment. What to do when you are panicking about the future? Do the above exercise, then consider the risks that are actually threatening you right here, right now. Most likely you are curled up on a couch all cosy and right NOW everything is fine! So make the decision to ‘worry about everything else later’ and get on and enjoy the moment!
Balinese people are masters of the moment. After four days of no water supply from the government in the village, still when water does come, nobody thinks to fill the mandi (bath) bucket ‘just in case’! They look at me blankly when I suggest it, as if to say ‘eh? We have water now, don’t we?’ I have to admire them for that!
http://www.baliadvertiser.biz/articles/spiritual/2003/the_incredible.html
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